Chasing the Music: For the Love of Music Book 0.5 Read online

  “First off, you’re nobody.”

  Griffin nodded, conceding the point since he really was the last person to join their crew.

  “Second off, she’s tired. We’re on tour. It’s exhausting. Why the hell do you think I bring her coffees like eighteen times a day?”

  Griffin was about to argue, but Bridget cut him off. “Lita is fine. If you knew her, or spent time with her, you’d know she was fine, but you don’t know her and you don’t spend time with her.” Her frown deepened with every phrase.

  “She looks sick,” Griffin said simply. “That’s all.”

  “Are you her keeper?” Bridget asked. “She eats. I’m with her. Our schedule sucks. She’s allowed to be tired.”

  “We purposefully slowed the schedule,” Dave said quietly.

  But Bridget’s eyes shifted to Dave just enough that Griffin knew that she might be lying. And if she wasn’t outright lying, she’d certainly tweaked the truth.

  “Still grueling,” Dave added.

  Instead of arguing with Lita’s PA, or with Dave, Griffin pulled out his phone and hoped he had enough reception to do some searching on pale skin and weakness and weight loss. Even though it wasn’t his business. Even though he shouldn’t care.

  Ten

  It was just a shirt. A man’s shirt. Not just any man either, a man who had a girlfriend. But it was warm and smelled like guy, and again, it was warm. A nice contrast to the over air-conditioned hotel room.

  Lita craved more of the soup. More of how it made her feel energized without sitting too heavily in her stomach. It was just stress. Just the pressure of her job and the band and the crowds and the image. Always the image.

  “Your coffee.” Bridget set the cup next to her in the hotel room and Lita just stared at it. And stared. And stared.

  “You want me to get you something to help you sleep?” Bridget offered.

  Lita stood on legs that felt like they could have strength again. “No. Not now.”

  “Where are you going like that?”

  Lita looked down at her ratted jeans and Griffin’s shirt. Maybe if she just added boots. She opened the case with her shoes and pulled out a pair of mid-calf docs, lacing them up with weakened, but un-shaky fingers.

  Griffin filled her head. His smile. His laugh. His hair. His stubble. His shirt that smelled so...just...delicious. Why did all the good guys have to be taken? Still… She still just wanted to be around him. Curiosity? Torture? “I’m…” She let her eyes find Bridget’s. Could she confide in her friend? “I’m going to thank Griffin, I think.”

  Bridget’s face stayed impassive. “I’ll be here when you get back. Let me know if you need anything. We should order something massive for dinner tonight. Play catch up for your stomach or something.”

  Lita nodded.

  Before thinking too hard about seeking Griffin out, she pushed out the door and called Apelu. She’d figure out what to say to Griffin on the way.

  The crew was in full force backstage unloading the familiar cases of equipment. Those boxes were as much a part of her life as her wardrobe and almost as much as her guitar.

  Griffin leaned over an open guitar case, glancing over the instrument, closing it, and pulling the next onto his makeshift table. He was totally focused on his task, his muscles flexing as he shifted the guitars and boxes.

  She opened her mouth to speak, but Ryker set down two more cases and she paused. She shouldn’t be here. They were doing their work and she’d just get in the way. She could be so stupid...

  Wait.

  This was her show. She could check out anything she liked.

  “Hey,” she said as she hefted herself onto a stool near where the brothers worked. She swung her legs as if she were comfortable, when she was really strung up and on edge after collapsing against Griffin, smelling his shirt, thinking about him, falling asleep in front of him...

  “You look better,” Griffin said as he briefly glanced up.

  “I feel...mostly better.”

  “Good.” Griffin paused just barely long enough to give her a friendly smile.

  Disappointment dropped in her stomach. This wasn’t what she’d expected. She’d expected his eyes to linger on her for a moment at how his shirt hung on her body, or how she’d pulled her blond hair onto her head and off her neck.

  Griffin hoisted another guitar up and ran his fingers quickly up the strings. “Also ready for fine tuning,” he said before handing it off to Ryker.

  She opened her mouth to ask them out for a coffee, but she wasn’t sure how to start.

  Did she just ask?

  Was it a big deal?

  Wait.

  She held her breath. What if he said no?

  If anyone knew that she was this weak, she’d probably never sell another album. Ever.

  Griffin pulled out his phone and his face grew concentrated as he tapped the screen a few times. “I’d die without this checklist, Ryk.”

  “Right?” Ryker bumped his arm.

  Griffin glanced up at her, his eyes darting from her face to her neck to his shirt, but quickly put his eyes back on his phone.

  He had noticed her, he was just trying not to. That was a start. There was something about him... She just wanted more.

  A faint smile pulled at his lips as he tapped on his phone and her stomach twisted as she remembered who he was probably texting.

  Her mind or her body or both just kept ditching the information that he had a girlfriend. Over and over and over. That wasn’t information she could afford to let herself lose.

  “Should we find you another bowl of soup?” he asked as he stacked the last case.

  She wanted to jump off the stool and yell, “Yes!” but held it in. “It helped this morning. Might help me again.”

  “Great.” Ryker grinned. “We’re finished until final pre-show prep. Let’s go.”

  Lita held in her sigh as disappointment settled. Though, Ryker coming was probably a much smarter idea.

  Griffin smiled at his phone and typed for another moment.

  It was so hard to picture any of these people with lives outside of this. She certainly didn’t have one.

  “I’m assuming Apelu is waiting patiently near the doorway?” Ryker asked.

  She stared at Griffin, wishing she could know what was in his head. “He is.”

  “I don’t think we should be out too long.” Griffin’s eyes finally caught hers.

  “We won’t be,” she said as she moved for the limo, the guys close behind.

  “Wait.” Griffin stopped next to the car. “If you show up somewhere in this thing, everyone will know who you are.”

  Lita shrugged. People always knew. “It’s not like I can do anything about that.”

  Griffin spun his head from side to side. “There’s a little bakery there.” He pointed across the parking lot toward a strip mall. “Why don’t we just walk over?”

  Lita cocked a brow, and honestly she still felt a little shaky to make a walk that far.

  Ryker turned his back toward her, tapping just above his butt. “Jump up. I’ll piggyback you.”

  Lita snorted. “I don’t trust you.”

  Ryker grabbed Griffin by the cheek. “Trust this baby boy, then.”

  Could she? The thought of being that close to Griffin in a way that felt…allowed…

  Griffin took a stilted step forward. “I can for sure piggyback you. Promise.”

  Before giving herself time to think, she nodded and Griffin crouched, easily lifting her onto his very strong, very nice back. She found herself squealing as he stood fully up.

  “I’m so tall!” she laughed.

  “Lita?” Apelu walked around the car.

  “Come on.” She waved to Apelu. “You can come, too.”

  “I have to come, too.” He chuckled. “And it’s too damn hot for walking.”

  Lita had been cold for so long, the warmth felt perfect.

  The warmth of Griffin. Of the sun. The day…

 
They moved across the large, empty parking lot, the brown mountain peeking over Boise on one side. This was all she ever saw of places she traveled to—the roadway between the venue and the hotel, sometimes a little bit while coming and going, but not always. She breathed in again, the dust and dry hot air mixed with the spiced smell of Griffin.

  She had to find a way to make him less distracting.

  Lita’s body pressed against his back. A moment of holy shit Lita James’ legs are wrapped around your waist was followed swiftly by this girl is sick and you’re doing a good thing.

  He’d expected her to always feel larger than life. Like the rock star she was. Like a celebrity. But with the few moments of weakness, and the few words on the stage and on the bus, she was… She was a girl who was close to his age whose breasts were pressed against his back making his body shift in ways it definitely should not.

  “We made it!” Lita shouted.

  Apelu groaned.

  “I say we ditch the bakery for the ice cream shop.” Ryker pointed to a store front.

  Lita’s breath hit the side of Griffin’s face and he stumbled once. “You can let me down now. I can walk from here.”

  It felt as if every inch of her slid down every inch of him and he shivered the second her boots hit the ground.

  Griffin jumped away, letting out slow breaths, and staring at his feet.

  Stacy. Stacy. Stacy. Stacy.

  Ryker pushed open the door to the ice cream store, which was wedged in the center of a tired row of shops.

  “Make way for Lita James!” He laughed and Griffin slugged him in the shoulder.

  “Seriously?” Lita asked as she stepped through the door.

  “She hates that.” Ryker snorted as Griffin pushed past his brother. “And I’ve done it to her since the beginning.”

  “Because you’re an asshole,” Griffin said.

  Lita pinched the back of Ryker’s arm, making him convulse in front of her. “Why do I keep you around?” she growled.

  Ryker’s brows danced again and he rubbed his chest and stomach. “Eye candy. Three years of eye candy.”

  Lita snorted before glancing at Griffin.

  “Yes,” Griffin answered before she asked. “He’s always been like this.”

  A few people in line turned toward them as they stepped inside, Apelu tailing behind.

  Ryker laughed again as heads turned toward the group and Griffin’s stomach turned over. Recognition was probably the last thing Lita needed while feeling sick.

  “She won a look-alike contest across town,” Griffin blurted.

  Lita spun to face him, her face unreadable.

  “That’s all.”

  They stopped at the end of the short line and Lita let out a sigh as the few people in chairs went back to their treats.

  A skinny high school age kid in front of them narrowed his eyes at Lita. “You’re not tall enough to be Lita. How did you win?”

  Her brows went up.

  Ryker cackled.

  Griffin opened his mouth to speak, but nothing came out.

  The girl next to the skinny guy also gave Lita the once-over. “You should have done something to make your boobs look bigger and worn heels. Lita’s always in heels.”

  “Yeah…” Lita rested against Griffin. “I’ll remember that for next time. Thanks.”

  The couple nodded again before placing their order and the group snorted as they held in laughter.

  Lita tipped her head up to look at Griffin and his heart stumbled.

  “Too bad I don’t look more like Lita James. Wouldn’t that be something?” She snorted again, and everything in Griffin loosened in relief as she relaxed.

  Feeling so much for another girl while being with Stacy wasn’t something he ever, ever expected to face. Ever.

  At least he already knew what the right thing was, and Griffin was very good at always doing the right thing.

  Eleven

  “There you are!” a girl called just as Griffin pushed open the hotel room door.

  Griffin stopped just inside the door to see a woman he’d never seen before. He opened his mouth to question her, but Ryker stepped around him and pulled her tightly against him.

  “Are you serious?” Griffin asked. “We have to share a room. I really don’t need to listen to you all night.”

  Ryker nuzzled into the woman’s neck. “Then get lost for two hours, I’ll wear her out, and all you’ll have to deal with tonight is snoring.”

  The woman giggled, letting her body drape over Ryker more fully.

  Griffin jerked open the door and stepped into the hall. It’s not even that he was surprised, it’s that after the weirdness of his day, he wanted to veg in front of the TV. Wanted to sit and talk to Stacy.

  Whatever. He’d do that now.

  Griffin pounded on the down arrow of the elevator, and thought again about how Lita had just showed up. In his shirt. He had no idea what to do with the suspicion she’d come for him, or with the fact that she still had on his shirt.

  He couldn’t get a solid read on her, and he knew he shouldn’t be thinking about it. He should be wondering why he and Stacy had barely talked over the past few days. Or what it would be like to see her again.

  Just a few more weeks and they’d be in the south. He didn’t know if he craved it or dreaded it.

  He called Stacy and waited.

  “Hey…” she answered, sounding hesitant.

  “Everything okay?” Griffin asked

  “Oh…yeah…” Stacy stammered. “Sorry… Just…”

  And then silence.

  “Just?”

  “You’re comin’ this way soon, yeah?” she asked.

  Griffin stopped, his chest tightening. “In a while. Is everything okay? You seem weird.”

  “Oh!” Stacy laughed a little. “I’m fine. I’m sorry. I’m just between home and work and driving.”

  “Oh.” She wasn’t lying, but there was something else.

  He opened his mouth to call her on it, but let it fall closed again. Whatever it was, it probably wasn’t important. Or, she’d tell him when she was ready to.

  “Well, I wanna come to a show, and I might even drive and meet you guys a stop early? We could drive together or something?” she asked.

  The words were just like Stacy but the tone still felt off. “Sounds great,” he said because he wasn’t sure what would happen if he directly asked her what was up.

  “Okay!” In one word she sounded more like normal Stacy. “Gotta run!”

  “Love yo—”

  But she was gone.

  Griffin stared at his phone for a moment feeling completely mixed up. A part of him was relieved the conversations had changed to be more relaxed, a part of him was worried about her since she was being so weird, and another part of him wondered if something was coming that he didn’t know how to anticipate.

  Pausing in the lobby he leaned against the wall. Two hours for Ryker to finish with the girl. What an ass.

  Twelve

  Trying to practice a song Lita had never been able to get right on a day when she still felt shaky, hadn’t been able to even finish a child’s cone, and leaned against a guy she couldn’t have… It just wasn’t a good idea.

  But she kept moving through the song, only strumming the chord changes, and trying to get her vocals right. This was a song she wanted to make all her own, without the band, only she was sucking at it.

  “…I can’t have…I want you bad…”

  Griffin stopped on the stage.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked.

  Griffin shrugged. “Killing time while Ryker shares our room with someone.”

  Lita nodded.

  Bridget and Apelu rested off to the side of the stage while Lita stood in the center, but even that perfect center spot hadn’t given her whatever she was missing to get the song right.

  “I love that song,” he said. “I Want…” He cleared his throat. “…You Bad.”

  “Yeah�
�” Lita trailed off. “Me, too. I’ve wanted to do that one for a while.”

  He shifted his weight, like he wasn’t sure where to be. “It was one of my favorite covers to play.”

  “You’ve done this one?”

  Griffin’s hands shoved in his pockets, and her eyes rested on his wrist and the stack of bands there. Where had they all come from? And the cool thing was that she actually wanted to know. Not to be polite, but because she wanted to know Griffin more.

  Why him? Why? Seriously. WHY?

  “Yeah.”

  “Then you play it because I’m sucking right now.” She slipped the guitar strap over her head and handed the instrument to Griffin.

  He leaned forward like he was about to move her way, but his feet didn’t quite follow his body.

  “What?” she asked.

  He pulled in a deep breath and stepped forward until they stood next to each other. His eyes rested on her boots for a moment before he turned to stare at the rows of seats. “Wow.”

  “What?” she asked again.

  “This!” He gestured toward the empty chairs with two hands. “Do you ever get tired of this?”

  Did she?

  “Only when I suck at a song.” She pushed the guitar toward him. “Here.”

  He glanced down at her mom’s guitar. “I’ll grab another.”

  Lita slipped the guitar strap back over her shoulder, closed her eyes, and whispered through the words of the song again. It was a hot song. A sexy song. Instead the words felt stilted and awkward as they left her mouth. Of course. It was another reminder that she was not the girl she tried to make the world believe she was.

  “What happened to you?” Griffin teased as he plugged in one of the spares. From the audience, it probably looked the same as her mom’s guitar, but not to her.

  “What do you mean?”

  “I don’t know.” He looked her over again, as if he were studying her. “Your mood changed or something.”

  “Nothing.”

  “You’re a liar,” he said with a smirk.

  She found herself smiling back, glad he called her on it, but relieved he wasn’t pressing for the truth.